God created us, male and female (Genesis 5:2 and Matthew 19:4) and there are still only those two genders despite what you may have heard. Scientifically, we are born with an x or y chromosome determining our gender and physical characteristics. (Those other “genders” are a topic for another day.) God then created the institution of marriage between one man and one woman. (Genesis 2:24 and Matthew 19:5-6) Since marriage is God’s creation, it only works the way it is designed if He is directly involved and if the love described in the 13th chapter of 1 Corinthians is mutually present as well.
You have heard the old saying, “Opposites attract”. That statement applies to more than opposite sexes or physical attraction. However, it is not two opposing forces drawn into combat with each other, even though that sadly applies to some marriages I have witnessed. Perhaps it would be better stated as two complimentary individuals uniting to form one complete entity. Carol and I both had a personal relationship with God and a desire to make Him a vital part of our marriage, but we had very different abilities, strengths and weaknesses. Those differences allowed us to use our abilities and strengths in our marriage, while leaning on each other for help with our weaknesses. A married couple who have the same abilities, strengths and weaknesses would be stepping all over each other’s toes while their common weaknesses would also weaken the marriage.
You have also heard the false statement that marriage is a 50/50 proposition. That, my friends, is the definition of divorce. Marriage is a 100/100 proposition with each person giving their all to make it work. The amazing thing is, when you give all of yourself to your spouse and your marriage, you get so much back in return that you could never experience on your own.
Did 50 years of marriage make me an expert on the subject? No! Not even close!
Was our marriage perfect? No! It was not! The only perfect marriage is the one between Christ and His Church. All others are imperfect copies.
Would I go through those 50 years of joy and sorrow; pleasure and grief; blessings and trials; agreement and conflict; comfort and pain with Carol again? Yes! In a heartbeat! Our mutual faith, love and trust would bring us through it once again. My only regret would be living through her death and trying to learn again to live without her.