Have you ever noticed that when a fight starts it is usually the second person who throws a punch who gets caught and receives the greatest punishment while protesting, “He (or she) started it!”? It is often the same with verbal confrontations. It isn’t fair, but the person who initiates the fight is always pleased when they are able to bring others down to their level and get them in trouble.
Our nation and our communities are being divided politically, racially and theologically creating conflicts and escalating vitriolic responses. No matter who started it, we are all in trouble as long as the verbal and even physical attacks continue to escalate. The real question isn’t who hurled the first insult, it is who will put an end to the name calling, stereotyping and hatred by refusing to be pulled down to that level? There will always be haters trying to start trouble, but when their hate is no longer masked by hateful counter attacks of others they will be seen as the real trouble makers they are.
I was living in the Chicago area in 1977 when the KKK planned a march through the predominantly Jewish suburb of Skokie. I sided with the ACLU and the courts when they defended their right of free speech, not because I support one word of their hateful message, but because I cherish my own right to speak my mind even if it isn’t popular. The truth remains the truth whether it is popular or not and I want to be able to speak and write the truth without fear of censorship. The march through Skokie took place with few protests. The KKK leaders shouted their ugly slogans and false accusations and then went home. There was no rush to join their movement. They were alone in the spotlight and seen as the trouble makers they were.
Please don’t misunderstand me. We must speak out against evil, but we must do it on our terms – with love; not on their terms – with hate. If we think we can love God and hate people we are only fooling ourselves. (1 John 4:20) Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. taught us that “hate cannot drive out hate. Only love can drive out hate”. When someone hurts me by being hateful, mean or totally thoughtless my immediate reaction is to retaliate in like manner. It is a normal human defensive response, but it will only end up getting me in trouble. The hardest thing for me to do as a believer is to put it in God’s hands, but He tells me, “Vengeance is mine.” (Romans 12:19 KJV) Why does He want to fight my battles? It is because He loves me and does not want me to end up with a heart as hard as theirs.
Even though He had the power to call fire from heaven to destroy them, Jesus looked out over the crowd that demanded his painful torture and execution and asked His Father to forgive them. I have learned from Jesus that the best revenge is not to allow myself to be dragged down to their level; instead, oppose their hate with His love.